I’m so sick of being sick with the fibromyalgia disease

By: Dr. Heather Morris

Having a chronic illness like fibromyalgia disease really takes its toll, especially when you have many other things like me. It increases and decreases but never disappears, at least it does not do it for me. Right now I must say that it is as bad as it has ever been. The pain level of my Fibromyalgia Disease has taken me so far that even my positive point of view is suffering. I’m so sick of being sick with fibromyalgia disease. My only escape is the dream I have, but now the pain of the fibromyalgia disease is twisting my dreams and I can not escape from there now. I wake up so aching that it makes me want to scream just to move. I’m so tired when I get up and when I was in bed. The relief seems to be escaping these days.

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Get more exercise, that’s what they say. They have no idea how difficult it is to do that when every movement makes you want to shudder with the pain of Fibromyalgia Disease. When walking any distance, the spine feels as if it crumbles and disintegrates. I do what I can, I walk short distances, I lift my legs in my chair, but it’s difficult. I want others to understand how difficult it is. Lose weight. I try, I really do. Without being able to be as active as you need to be, it is very difficult to do. I know that my weight, which was put on after getting sick, makes it worse. It also makes my self-image worse, which does not help at all. I wish I could lose it and I’m trying to do it, but it’s a slow process as I feel it.

Take your medications Yes, I promise, as they tell me to do, but it does not help enough. I’ve missed them and I was lucky not to spend the day huddled in a ball on the floor, so I know they help, but they’re not doing enough. There must be something to help give me back my life. Depression? Sure, I fight against depression. When there is not a part of your body that does not hurt all the time, you may also be depressed. I think those of us who work with this are much stronger than people give us credit for.

I can not even eat without experiencing the symptoms. Like something, he sends me running to the bathroom. There is no aspect of life that the disease of Fibromyalgia or the set of coexisting conditions do not affect. Whatever it is, there is a negative effect that accompanies it. The symptoms feed each other, and each one worsens the others. I try to stay positive. I know this will happen and I will feel better, but even then I will not feel well. I have my good spells, but still the omnipresent pain of fibromyalgia disease, depression, stomach problems, etc. still exists. Still, there are better times when I can do more and enjoy more, but what do I do in the meantime? I’m getting tired, physically, mentally and emotionally. I am losing hope that there are good days ahead and that relief can be found. I must not allow myself to get this way, I must always believe that there is hope, but at this moment that is difficult. I must keep the idea that this will also happen. I just hope it happens fast.

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